Life is way too short for forced, toxic friendships.
You’d rather be alone, or have a small circle of friends than have many toxic friends who add no value whatsoever in your life. Sometimes, some friendships die and it’s okay. If you feel there’s need to let go because you deserve better, you should do so and be unapologetic about it. However, many a times, we are actually the toxic ones, and we need to check ourselves every now and then. If you have been losing friends or can’t seem to keep friends, maybe you’re the toxic one? Have you ever thought about that/ Have you every taken a minute to reflect about your way of life and habits? If not, we will help you figure out if you’re the weed in the friendship that needs to be dealt with. Here are signs you’re the toxic friend.
1. You’re so negative and forever complaining.
When you link up with your friend or friends, you really never talk about anything positive and even if there’s great stuff to talk about, you always see the bad side of it. Look, no one wants negative energy around them, seriously, we are dealing with so much at the moment – Chinese takeover, Trumpism, everything being expensive, graft, murders and the last thing you want is someone complaining over petty stuff instead of trying to spread positive vibes. With all due respect, check yourself.
2. You’re self-centered.
All you care about is yourself. When you meet other friends, you only talk about your life and your problems. You come first, even in terms of sharing things. No one wants to be with people who show no empathy.
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3. You’re a user.
You want your friends to take care of most costs when you go out. You’re a grown ass and it’s no one’s responsibility to take care of you financially. Be a responsible friend, not a user.
4. You’re never happy for your friend.
Instead of celebrating their small achievements, you see the negative side. For instance, if your friend gets a scholarship in Norway, instead of congratulating them, you will start saying things like “Wow it’s so cold there, how will you survive?”. A true, genuine friend is happy when their friends achieve great things, not the opposite.
5. You gossip behind their backs.
If you’re talking smack about your friend, then you’re a toxic person. That means you’re also untrustworthy.
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6. You try to change them.
No one wants to be told “Act like this, dress like this” and all that shebang, especially by a friend, let alone a boyfriend. You should never have to change your true self for anyone who truly likes or loves you. So, if you’re that kind of friend, constantly trying to change your friends, you’re the toxic one.
7. You’re a bad influence.
Sure, it’s okay to party and get lit every now and then, but there should be a limit for everything. Don’t introduce your friends to drugs and bad vices which are bad for them. What’s the point? Who will benefit? Be someone that makes a positive impact in another person’s life.
8. You’re never wrong.
Basically, you have to win every argument. You hate being told what to do; you dictate everything. You should be the kind of person that can take positive criticism well and handle conflict like an adult. Some people will get so stubborn after an argument and give you silent treatment even when there’s no need to. Like, are you 12 or something?
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9. Drama follows you everywhere.
People dread hanging out with you cause every time they do, somehow, there must be drama!
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ALSO READ: 7 types of friends you should never let go
10. You’re a pathological liar.
You lie so much that your life itself is a lie. The right friends will accept you for who you are; you do not have to lie about your life, your job and what not to be accepted by others.
11. You offer no support.
Remember what I said about being self-centered? When you meet with your friends, you don’t even care to ask how they’re fairing. Even when something happens in their life and they need you, you’re suddenly unavailable to be there for them.
12. You always cancel plans.
Clearly, you have your priorities right…
13. You get jealous when your friend hangs out with other friends.
You should understand that people have other friends and acquaintances and cannot dedicate their entire free time to spending it with you only.
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ALSO READ: Is it time to end a friendship? Here are signs
Source: Lifestyle.NG